Double Post... What's Next?

So, I was looking back through my posts since I've started this blog. I had to laugh. I have written exactly three December blog posts in the previous four years. I started this blog on Christmas Day 2010. This Christmas will be five years of documenting my life. It started out as a way to document my weight loss and turned into so much more.

A couple of things became quite clear in my reminiscing...

1. December sucks for weight loss! That's why I avoided posting during December. But I always came back in January!
2. It is very interesting to look back at how much my life has changed over the last five years!
3. I'm a pretty good mom. My girls have always been a huge part of my blogging and, although at times I may have felt/feel like I'm failing them, there is plenty of proof that I'm doing my best with them.
4. Life can throw you some serious curve balls!
5. The only thing you can control in life is how you handle those curve balls and how you choose to live each day you are given. 
6. Change is inevitable, but it can be the best thing to happen!

It's funny, I can read a post on here and instantly flashback to where I was, how I felt, or feel the feelings I had during whatever event I'm blogging about. It's bittersweet. I shared a lot, but I left so much more out. Even when I was going through my divorce, I was unable to let myself share my true feelings and thoughts.

This blog has seen me through so much! When I started it I was miserable. I was morbidly obese. I had a baby who screamed all day and night and I felt like an utter failure as a mom and wife. Things started to change quickly though. I sent my first baby off to preschool. I graduated from college with a 3.4 GPA with a 3 year old and a baby at home. I got divorced and soon after, I lost my job. I met Andy. I got a new temporary job and finished it six months later. I sent my last baby off to preschool. I got engaged!!! The Hubby and I both got new jobs. He and the kids moved in with the girls and I. We got married. We bought a house and a puppy. We got married again... the "real one" this time.

Those are just the highlights. I could have never predicted that this would be my life when I started this blog five years ago. I'm glad I jumped in and started this journey. My life has been crazy and hard and stressful... I've had days where I laughed so hard that my sides hurt, weeks of tears, nights lying awake with fears of the unknown... but today proves that you can't plan your life, you just live it and try to enjoy it!

I may be only a couple of pounds lighter than I was two and three years ago at the end of the year (yes, I weighed the same at the end of 2012 as I did at the end of 2013), but that means I shed all the weight that I gained in 2014! Look on the bright side right? 

It really isn't about the weight loss though - it's about the life changes. I'm nowhere near the person I was when I started this blog on Christmas night five years ago. I am successfully meeting the goal of healing that person. I haven't finished, I don't know if I ever will. There will always be a need for healing - new injuries, new hurts, old hurts, even old injuries. I haven't given up yet and I have no intention of doing so in the near future. 

In the end, the number one thing I've taken away from rifling back through old posts today is simple...

Bring it on... I'm ready!