Happy Times Are Here Again!

Yes, I still live for the weekend! Even though weekends are harder than heck on my willpower. It has just been one of those weeks. I'm ready to have some downtime to reset my brain, and attitude, before Monday strikes again.

Since it's Friday it was also officially weigh in day this morning. I am proud to report that for the first time in far too long, the scale did not bounce right back up the week after a good loss! Actually, I went back and looked... It's been over a year since I have lost more than two weeks in a row with my weight under that dreaded 200 mark. A YEAR!!! That's insane! The past year has been a horrible yo-yo that has gone down, up, up, down, up, up, up, down... No wonder I've been beyond frustrated.

I'm not saying that I have that problem solved, but I'm hoping I do. The doc I'm seeing is beyond awesome. He listens to me and really helps me express the issues I'm having to try and help me with them. It's been a slow process, but I'm feeling confident that he's going to help me figure out how to get my body sorted out.

 

I mentioned a while back that he had put me on meds, but that I was going to wait to expand on that until I found out if they helped. Well, they didn't, but I'll explain. So, if you're curious about the medical side of my journey, keep reading. If not, I won't be offended, but you'll want to stop here!

When I met my new doc he immediately put me on Metformin for my insulin resistance. I have extreme PCOS and this is a common treatment for PCOS patients who are trying to lose weight, or at least help balance out the hormones in their body. I started at 500mg and, to my surprise, my body did well with it. I slowly increased to 750mg and was still doing well. When I visited him at my two month check up he decided to double my dosage of Metformin to 1500mg because my body was still proving that my hormones were all wonky. He also added Welbutrin.

Welbutrin in an anti-anxiety med that is often used to treat ADHD. It has also had great success when used for smoking cessation as it helps curb addictive cravings. Those on it for that reason also found they were losing weight. So, professionals started using it as a weight loss med due to the ability to curb addictive cravings and handle the anxiety associated with quitting a bad habit (sugar, junk food, etc.).

Unfortunately for me it made me nauseous as heck! I put up with it for three weeks in hopes that my body would adjust, but it didn't. I couldn't lose weight on it because I was constantly stuffing my face with crackers to try to curb the nausea. For someone who's body hates carbs, this was a lose/lose situation. When I saw the doc in March he immediately took me off of it and we decided to try another route.

Before I went in for my three month check up I wasn't absolutely certain if it was the Welbutrin making me sick, or the increase in Metformin. So, I cut back to 750mg of Metformin again and have been slowly increasing it to the full amount now that my body is behaving itself. I'm up to a pill and a half each morning, which is 1,375mg, and I will bump up the rest of the way this weekend. I'm honestly shocked at how well my body is tolerating this med because in the past we have not been friends!

So, the new route the doc and I agreed on is adding a different med with my Metformin. The goal is to help my body see that losing weight is not a horrible thing and that it does not need to freak out when I lose weight, or when I decide to eat a piece of pizza on a Friday night.

The new med is phentermine.

I can't even express how hard it was to come to the decision that I was okay with being on meds to help with weight loss, especially a med specifically for that reason. First off... phentermine is not phen phen. I have read all of the risks and concerns and talked to my doc about it thoroughly. He answered a lot of my questions and calmed my fears. I trust his choice to try this particular med. The hardest part was getting over the feeling that I'm a failure for not being able to do this on my own. I actually still struggle with that one.

This is med is not a magical solution to all of my struggles. If I eat like crap while taking this med, it will not work. I know some people report that they effortlessly lost 30 pounds in a month, or that they had zero appetite so they lost super fast, or that they ate whatever they wanted to and still lost. My body doesn't allow such ridiculousness. If I don't eat, I feel sick and get horrible headaches (this has always been true for me, so it is not a side effect). Plus my doc wants me to eat at least 90g of protein every day. If I can't do that, I can't keep taking this med. I am not losing super fast on this med. I still have to watch my carbs and make good choices. If I eat fast food, my body wants to gain. The difference with this med is that one "off" meal doesn't make me gain six pounds. Instead, I might gain 1/2 to 1 pound after eating a carb laden or greasy dinner.

To give you an idea of it's power, I was on this med while in Disney and I gained seven pounds. This is not a magic pill! I still have to work for any success I can claim.

I'm still not entirely sold that it is the final answer for me either. We'll see how things go from here. I never know how my body will respond to anything, but for now it is helping with random binging and I already know what I should eat to get the best results. This week, while I made mostly good choices, I also ate a few more carbs than usual and the results were that I lost less than a pound.

I have expressed concern about what will happen when I come off this med, but my doc assures me he won't just pull me off and leave me to figure it out. Much like the past few months, we will continue to see how my body handles my choices and life changes and then decide what the best approach is for me. I'm sure that approach will change as my body and mental outlook change with this journey.

As I mentioned before, this doc made it clear that we're in it for the long haul. I won't just see him to lose the weight. I will see him through two years of maintenance as well to make sure I know how to maintain and how to keep my body working at full capacity at a healthy weight and size.

So, that's where I'm at with the medical side of things. I'm still eating 90% THM. Some days I eat more crossovers than others, but I'm learning to listen to my body. Eating 90 grams of protein every day is not always easy. To hit that number I still have to plan and eat a solid amount of carbs with every meal and snack. But it's all working right now.

Outside of the scale moving, I can feel the changes. I am back to eating almost no sugar (I've had a couple weak moments). My water intake is awesome because this medicine makes me thirsty. A lot of my clothes are fitting looser, while a few pairs of pants are even starting to fall down a bit. I'm gaining energy daily. I'm sleeping better and I just feel better. I definitely feel happier. Each day I feel a bit better about myself, my progress and my reflection in the mirror. That's the best progress I could ever ask for!