I Have Graduated!!!

Cue the band..

I'm proud to announce that as of today I have graduated from post-op therapy!! I've actually graduated from a specific therapist who I started working with a few months ago. It feels AMAZING to be told that you have met all the goals set and that you are in such a good place right now that we don't need to continue sessions unless I feel like I need to down the road!

First, I cannot stress enough how important it is to reach out for help... no matter what stage you are at in your life. Therapy isn't a bad word. It might seem intimidating to make the call for that first appointment, but I promise you will be happy you did! 

I had started with a different therapist before surgery, because having an established relationship with a therapist was part of the requirements for me to get my surgery. As I hit my six month stall, I knew I needed more help than I was getting with that therapist, so I asked for a referral to one within the Weight Management Program that my surgeon was part of. The new therapist was a perfect fit!!

 

 

After the first appointment I had some homework to try to work through my frustrations and learn to quiet the food noise in my head. By my 5th visit she announced that I didn't need to have regular appointments anymore. I had met all of the goals we had set for me in the first appointment, and to be completely honest, I was feeling like a whole different person than I was in that first appointment.

• One of my final assignments that she gave me was to document how I'm feeling and how I got here, so here goes:
• Over the course of all of my appointments, these were the strategies we worked through:
• Busy my hands and mind more... draw/doodle after meals to give my body time to understand that its needs were met.
• Create a memory or positive thoughts album in my phone to bring me back to my happy place and my "why"
• Continue walking during my lunch hour and try to walk up to the 4th floor at work to catch the sunrise as often as possible. Also, walk to the bathroom farther away instead of right across the hall.
• Online group for motivation, step challenge, etc.
• Set calendar reminders to move, or pay attention to when my watch tells me to get up and move
• Visual step tracker - document my daily steps so I can see how my week and going and make adjustments
• Mindfulness when going into the kitchen - don't just aimlessly walk in and start looking in the fridge or pantry. Feel textures before opening doors to redirect my mind and senses.
• Check self when wandering - what am I doing and what could I be doing?
• Mindful intention while driving places to avoid the chatter about fast food or stopping for snacks I don't want
• Build a list of things that bring cozy, content, and satiation (break down into small tasks) 

I'm still working on a lot of these, but the difference between my mind now and my mind two months ago is just crazy! Things felt very easy in those early months post-op, but when the weight stopped coming off, the mental game got very real!

As for how it feels... 

When I started with her in November I was so frustrated. I honestly wanted to say just screw it and let whatever happens happen. Unfortunately, the last time I did that I gained 60 pounds in a year! Needless to say, I knew I couldn't go that route. But my mind was a mess, my mental health was tanking, and I was realizing that it was affecting all aspects of my life in one way or another.

Over the past two months I have started to feel more like myself again! I go for walks at work, I'm happier at home and my fuse isn't quite as short. I'm proud of myself for pushing through difficult situations instead of caving immediately because I feel like I can't do it. I CAN do it! I WILL do it!

While my plateau hasn't really been broken yet, I feel like I'm in a much better place mentally. I don't feel like it all sucks, the food chatter has quieted to almost just a whisper at times, and when I say no I feel like I'm a freaking rockstar! That word has been so hard for me to say the past 4 years, but it was time I remembered how to do it.

So, my assignment is complete. In the shortest form: I feel amazing for meeting my goals and I feel in control again after feeling utterly out of control for so long. I feel like me again!!