Reality Check - Being Obese Sucks!

This past week has been an extremely eye opening week. It hasn’t been one big AH-HA moment, but more of a continuous string of little moments that have beat the reality of my situation into my very thick skull. 

The Whole Truth & Nothing But The Truth 

There are things you don’t think about being difficult when you are a person of normal weight, or even someone who is slightly overweight.

Two years ago, I was 60 pounds lighter than I am right now.

That's 60 pounds of butter in one image. UGH! And this is a comparison photo almost exactly 2 years apart.

It is crazy to me how much harder everyday things are when carrying so much extra weight.

• I sweat profusely with the slightest activity.
• Speaking of sweat, it gets caught in places that I never had to worry about before and I'm constantly worrying that I stink.
• My flexibility is gone! I grunt bending over to pick things up or put on my socks. And wiping my butt is a chore. Yes, I went there!!
• My clothes are too tight, or at the very least don't fit well, so I'm utterly uncomfortable wearing regular clothes.
• I feel like shit and that's putting it nicely! My headaches are far more frequent, even on meds. My body pain is at an all-time high. My back hurts so bad that I barely sleep and basic chores are almost impossible.
• Speaking of socks... they cut into my legs/ankles which is highly uncomfortable.
• I absolutely HATE shopping for clothes, see the first and second items in this list.
• My butt is so wide that I now fill up the entire seat of the recliner at the movie theater, if I move I accidentally hit the button and move the seat unintentionally.

I was petrified about getting on the plane in November. I was honestly afraid I wouldn't fit. Thankfully that wasn't the case, but it very well could have been.

Baring it All

So, why am I baring my soul to the world wide web? 

First, if what I'm going through can help just one person feel like they aren't alone in this, my brutal honesty is totally worth it.

Second, maybe by laying all my cards down I won't feel so alone in this. Let's be honest, I've heard some good comments already... 

"You don't need surgery, you know you can lose weight on your own."

"Are you on meds that make you gain weight?"

"You've done it before, I'm sure you can do it again."

"Don't take the easy way out.."

To these comments I simply say, "Clearly, I cannot lose weight and keep it off without help. Some of my meds may work against me, but this is me. I have lost weight before... several times. And it's depressing to know that I had gotten close to goal, but I've never actually achieved it once in my adult life. I want to lose weight without taking a daily pill that messes with other things in my body while 'helping' me. And finally... if you think going through surgery to have about 80% of my stomach removed, or route my insides to bypass my stomach altogether, is 'the easy way out' then your idea of easy is a wee bit warped."

Okay, so that wasn't a simple answer, but it is my basic answer to any of the above.

I am doing what I need to do to be around and functional in another 20 years. At the rate I'm going, I don't think I'd be mobile in 10. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

New Year, New Me

So, 2023... I'm ready for you. It will be a year of gut checks, emotional checks, mental health checks, physical checks, and patience checks. I have a long road ahead of me, but it is one that I am completely ready to travel. 

Now, let's see how many of those items I can cross off my bullet list as I take this journey to a slimmer, healthier me!