Life at 8 Months Post-Op

Tomorrow is my 8 month sleeve-iversary. That’s crazy! These past few months have flown by! And honestly, I haven’t posted in a while because I have felt a bit like a failure. Here I am, 8 months post-sleeve surgery and my expectations for where I’d be by this point have been blown to smithereens! So, I’ve been avoiding coming here to update.

Long story short… for the past 3+ months I have not had a solid handle on my food and cravings. Actually, my cravings have been through the roof! The food chatter in my head has been driving me absolutely crazy. Thankfully I have an awesome support system (medically and at home), I voiced my concerns, and I’m working on all of it.

But let’s back up a bit…

At the end of September into the first week of October we went to California for a week. We had a blast!! Two days at Disneyland, many stops at the beach, and so much more! I was pleasantly surprised to see my weight maintained when we got back and I even hit the 40 pound mark a week later!!

Unfortunately since hitting the 40 pound mark I almost immediately went back up to bouncing between the same couple of numbers on the scale. It’s definitely frustrating, but it’s even worse when it sneaks up a little higher. Thankfully that usually only happens on days when I’ve indulged a little too much and it drops back down within a couple of days.

Last month I I finally made the decision to change therapists to someone who specializes in eating disorders and chronic pain disorders. She has been absolutely AMAZING!!! I also got a referral to the Weight Management Specialist to see if we can help my body with the parts I’m struggling so much with, plus assist my therapist from a medicine standpoint to quiet the nonstop food chatter in my head. Because, I truly struggle with that the most and it is far worse post-op than it ever was before.

Then this month I finally got in with the Weight Management Specialist who works with my surgical group. He reminded me that the surgery is only a tool for limiting the AMOUNT you can eat. It does not solve the problems associated with hormones, insulin resistance, and all that lovely stuff. So, I’m working with him on additional tools to help with the PCOS and hysterectomy-related issues, as well as the constant food chatter in my head!

I want to be completely transparent about all of this whole process. It is FREAKING HARD! I’m dealing with mental challenges I never had to before surgery. The fear of failing mixed with the constant feeling of never being satiated is absolutely insane. I thought this surgery would help me feel full, but quickly learned that full and satiated are two completely different things.

Don’t get me wrong, the past few months have been chalk full of NSV’s, just not as many SV’s or food victories as I would like.

For example:

I’ve lost a total of 54+ inches across my body, and even though I have been in a stall since August, I’ve lost over 5.5″ across my body during that stall. That’s how TALL I am! Dang!!

	April-Dec 2023	Change During Stall (Aug-Dec)
Neck	-1.5	-0.20
Biceps (L)	-2.48	-0.10
Biceps (R)	-2.20	-0.39
Chest	-5.79	-0.74
Waist	-9.34	-1.72
Abdominal	-7.28	-0.66
Hips	-6.93	-0.88
Thigh (L)	-3.27	-0.85
Thigh (R)	-3.52	-0.51
Calf (L)	-1.95	-0.02
Calf (R)	-1.59	-0.16
Fupa**	-8.25	-0.73
TOTALS	-54.10	-5.62

*Measurements are taken with Renpho Health ES-Tape Measure
**Fupa measurements began in Month 2

I’ve solidly moved into size 12 jeans and work pants, and my XL leggings are far too big and tend to fall down while I wear them leaving me looking like I have droopy diaper drawers. I’m on the last hole of my belt, when it wasn’t too long ago that I could barely get it into the first hole! And I look like I’m drowning in my XXL hoodies (but they are soooo comfortable).

Clearly my overall size has gone down quite a bit from where I began. I’m proud of myself for getting this far, but sometimes those horrible self-doubting voices sneak back into my head telling me I’m a failure, that I’m weak, or comparing my current weight/size to what I was 3, 4, or even 5 years ago. I hate it, but I’m working on it!

In the meantime, I’ll try to limit my Christmas treats and find other ways to keep my hands busy so I don’t graze. It’s a tough time of year, but I refuse to be a statistic of the holiday season. No holiday weight gain for me this year!!